You Love. I’ll Jerk.

Remember smiley
serving tables,
making people
feel special?

That was service me;
a player
pandering
& patronizing.

I’m not surprised
he’s the me you wanted;
wanting, self-serving,
to feel special.

But, there was more:
a guy behind
who didn’t smile,
who hated guile.

A curmudgeon
keeping me single;
breaking every heart
including mine.

I really wanted
to find someone
who loved that guy
behind the lie.

But why would
anyone decent
want to endure
this secret jerk?

I never did
answer that
with anything
resembling reason.

Why do you
put up with me;
with all this
inadequacy?

Doesn’t matter.
Just glad you do.
Please don’t go.
Please,

just be you.

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